2024 April TAT Forum

Humor {(h)yo͞omər}

“One thing you must be able to do in the midst
of any experience is laugh. And experience
should show you that it isn’t real, that it’s a
movie. Life doesn’t take you seriously, so why
take it seriously.” ~ Richard Rose, Carillon

~ Thanks to BH. Source unknown. Appears on sites like:
https://www.literaturedaydreams.com/category/diversity/ and
https://heliosliterature.com/2014/12/26/the-perpetua-lsearcyh-for-truth/
as well as Facebook, Pinterest, et al.

Investment Advice

Warren Buffett is often quoted as saying,
“I try to buy stock in businesses that are so
wonderful that an idiot can run them.
Because sooner or later, one will.”

Secrets

Thanks to Funny Husbands and Wives.

Inspiration & Irritation

Irritation moves us; inspiration provides a direction

Rainbow Connection

… from the 1979 film The Muppet Movie, with music and lyrics written by Paul Williams and Kenneth Ascher.

Why are there so many
Songs about rainbows
And what’s on the other side?
Rainbows are visions
But only illusions
And rainbows have nothing to hide
So we’ve been told and some choose to believe it
I know they’re wrong wait and see

Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

Who said that every wish
Would be heard and answered
When wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that
And someone believed it
Look what it’s done so far
What’s so amazing that keeps us stargazing
And what do we think we might see?

Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

All of us under its spell
We know that it’s probably magic

Have you been half asleep
And have you heard voices?
I’ve heard them calling my name
Is this the sweet sound
That calls the young sailors?
The voice might be one and the same
I’ve heard it too many times to ignore it:
It’s something that I’m supposed to be

Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me
Da-da-da-dee-da-da dum
Da-da-da-da-dee-da-da-doo

Thanks to Dan M. for recommending this amazing video.

Paradoxical Intention

“Fighting fear doesn’t work.”

How do we face fears?

“But now let us look at the paradoxical contrast presented by the two religio-philosophical disciplines of Buddhism and the Vedanta, which I called a sort of positivistic-substantialism. I submit that the paradox here lies in the fact that all of our formulations are dependent upon the characteristics of dualistic consciousness, upon that character in our cognition whereby we are unable to know anything save in contrast to its other. The implication is that any statement, any self-contained, logically coherent statement, is of necessity partial only. If in part it reveals a truth, yet in part, by its one-sidedness, is of necessity a falsity; and that then in order to arrive at a higher order of completeness we must consider a contradictory religio-philosophic position, and thereby we have a self-correcting complex. This in a few and rather simple words is, I submit, the resolution of the paradox. Truth, as it is in itself, can only be known by him who abides in a state of absolute dumbness. If by truth we mean a statement that is wholly true, then every statement ever uttered by any of us, or by any of all mankind—spoken, written, or thought—is a lie. We are all liars when we speak or think, and know and are the truth only when in the state of absoluteness dumbness.

“Now, having brought you to this most unsatisfactory and depressing conclusion, I shall leave you to your painful ruminations and wish you good luck.”

~ Thanks to Shawn Nevins, who wrote: [Above] is a small excerpt from a long transcript of Franklin Merrell-Wolff called “Meaning of the Paradox.” I really just wanted the last sentence but felt a little more context was needed, as it exemplifies the task of an authentic guru. [“Meaning of Pardox” mp3 and pdf files (scroll down).]

Exposing Scientific Dogmas
Banned TED Talk by Rupert Sheldrake

=> Examples of where dogmatic assumptions actually inhibit inquiry.

=> 10,000+ Comments

Please your thoughts on the above items.

Reader Commentary

Encouraging interactive readership among TAT members and friends

A reader wrote that what would make the Forum more interesting would be:

Hearing from people who are searching—and have questions instead of those providing endless advice and “answers.” What challenges they are facing. What their doubts and questions are. How they perceive their path is going. What they are doing in their lives. Where they think they will end up, etc., etc.

Can you help make the Forum more interesting?

The Reader Commentary question for the April TAT Forum:

What are you emotional attitudes towards suffering as it arises in your life?

Thanks to Eric C., who quoted Frank Ostaseski in reference to this month’s question: “Our avoidance instinct is also due to the fact that our culture has decided that suffering has no value.” Responses follow:

From Michael R:

Looking at the quote by Frank Ostaseski and the question for this month’s Forum, what comes to mind is that one value of suffering is the direction it points you and what this might tell you about yourself. Physical pain points you away from physical harm. The value here isn’t in the pain, it’s in the alarm bell it sounds to move you away from threat. Emotional pain does the same thing, but emotional pain seems to be based more on the psychological self as opposed to the physical self, so it can serve as a helpful pointer towards self images and afflictions to those senses of self. And then there’s existential suffering, longing, whatever word we put to that particular pain that seems deeper than the personality. Perhaps this ache points you Home. Maybe there’s more to suffering than it’s pointing away from itself, maybe there’s an intrinsic value in the suffering alone. I can’t say this is usually how I respond to it, but it does exist in this world and I can’t help but wonder if that must mean there’s value there. If this is all “God” . . . then apparently suffering is part of the show. Maybe endless peace would be boring? It’s hard to know.

From Lena S:

I feel that a line could be drawn between suffering that destroys, devolves and degrades, and suffering that can elevate or result in evolution. Very similar to personal disciplines that can result in either rote mentality and behavior, or the possibility of something greater resulting. Suffering and self-discipline both have a struggle in common, and the secret sauce to both is tension and whether either the sufferer or the practitioner succumbs to a resulting lower state or aspires to higher, unexpected possibilities. The unfortunate nature of both is that one in the midst of either suffering or discipline would never be able to anticipate whether evolution were to be the result. It seems human nature leads us to expect suffering to always lead to hopelessness of misfortune, and self-discipline to lead to the pride of progression.

Recently I heard a metaphor of an archer standing on the banks of the Ganges with his bow pulled back full and holding. For one, in archery the arrow is released instantly upon the maximum tension having been attained, but why does this grand archer hesitate? Maybe there’s some trick to suffering, to self-discipline as well as to archery that in our own personal journey, needs to be found.

From Peter O’Doherty:

Like most people I imagine, I don’t like suffering and my habitual reaction to it is to try and “fix the problem” as quickly as possible, to not have to suffer any more.

But when I look at my mind and how it’s causing the suffering, by resisting what is, this for me is where the work starts.

So, what do I mean, work starting? It’s all the ways I try and accept the suffering, by accepting what is. Accepting that whatever is happening in my life that I can’t change and that I am resisting, I try and surrender/accept that, try and surrender to the fear and the resistance. Try not to push it away. Allow it to be. To Trust life and the outcome, it wants. To accept Thy Will over My Will.

There is a multitude of ways this plays out for me internally, sometimes it’s something as simple as looking around the world at some of the horrendous suffering being experienced by people and telling myself how lucky I am and that suffering is just a part of life and to accept my fair share of it.

It sounds simple, but it’s not easy. Especially when life is really playing hard ball, but what’s the alternative, it’s either learn to accept what is or resist it and suffer more. It all boils down to one thing for me, that’s learning to trust Life. The more I trust it the easier it becomes. So, learning how to trust life and the direction it wants to go and then just accepting that, when I have no other choice. That then is the only choice and, in my experience, when life looked so cold, cruel, and hard and when I begged and pleaded with it not to go the way it was, with time and hindsight it always has worked out for the better.

From Dan McLaughlin:

Compassion
Humor
Apathy

Joy
…all emotions
All of them
And
I’ve never met someone
Who didn’t
Actually believe
They were a person
Who would
Sincerely
Say
Anything different
Reaction monitors
Are
[slang word for contemptible or stupid persons :-)] of the highest caliber

Have they allowed for love at all?

From Patrick K:

Over the last decade I have become more positive toward suffering, and have come to realise that “life is suffering”. The turning point for me was reading things from Rose who liked using the Horace quote, “Adversity reveals genius, prosperity conceals it”. This is close to Marcus Aurelius’s quote, “What is in the way becomes the way, the impediment to action advances action”. There are a lot of folks in the self inquiry groups that like the stoics. I think stoicism is making a bit of a resurgence these days, so I find inspiration from Rose and others who not just use those quotes, it becomes their life.

Something that helped me overcome “avoidance instinct” was help from some NLP one-liners by Tony Robbins. The “fear of not doing something” has to outweigh the “fear of doing something”. The fear of not acting has to outweigh the fear of acting. And if you don’t do, don’t follow your heart’s desire, you will turn a positive original intention into a negative frustration; you’re basically just getting in your own way. It is so true that suffering is completely overlooked by the masses. Because folks are just so busy working on covering it up, they don’t bear to face it. My favourite pill of choice to cover up my suffering is to listen to my YouTube feed of music; it helps me dull the pain a bit after a long day, escapism. But then I get to see how I’m using music, and it starts to not have the same effect. Then I distract myself by looking in the cupboard for something to eat that I don’t need to eat. Maybe one day I’ll be able to bear the brunt of facing suffering square in the face, or just finding a way to fully accept it.

So that brings up the power of “discipline”. If you have some disciplines in your life that you stick to, you can draw strength from them. If someone told me ten years ago that I would have given up all confectionery, crisps, caffeine, eating after 7pm, TV entertainment, and radio entertainment as I am now, I wouldn’t have believed them. The practice of “self-denial” can be a great aide and mental strength. When I couldn’t hack my emotional reactions to suffering, I drew on “comforts” to soothe the pain. So the job is to remove the comforts as best you can, and observe “what constitutes as comforts” with the intent of backing away from them, the untruth. A good quote is, “Verily, the lust for comfort murders the passion of the soul and then walks grinning in the funeral”. Also someone said before that I found quite powerful, paraphrased, “to solely use the Holy Spirit as your only comfort”.

So maybe the work is to find a way to just abide in the Holy Spirit, which is no mean feat. When it comes to the Holy Spirit, what captures the sense of that for me comes from one of Father Chad Ripperger’s sermons on YouTube, where he talks about Holy Mary having such a “rich inner life”, connection with God. Apparently, it is because of this that Lucifer became a fallen angel, a demon, because of his raging jealousy of Mary’s connection with God. Father Chad talks with such a felt reverence about Mary, that she carried her burdens throughout her life and didn’t once complain. I, as a mere mortal, have certainly not carried my burdens well throughout my life and continue to fall short, a work in progress.

From Sheri R:

A knock on my front door and I look up from a sink of water where dishes are soaking while waiting for their turn at a good scrubbing.

I dry my hands on the rumpled tea towel and meander towards the door with a peaceful wondering of who could be visiting.

The door opens from the inside.

“Oh, sweet Suffering! It’s you! What a lovely surprise!
Did you lose your way in the snowstorm on the weekend?

No, you didn’t. You were lost before it set in. Oh, I am very sorry for that. It must have been very difficult for you!

Are you going to come in?
Of course I want you! You know you are welcome here.
Yes, I see you have many tagalongs this time. That’s okay, they are also welcome. I see fear, sadness, anxiety, a bit of anger….yup…oh,….and happiness hiding behind the tree. She is a tricky one, I agree!

The sofa sags disproportionally as Suffering sits with a heavy sigh. I settle into the mismatched chair across from her. She speaks quietly and long of the shoulds, woulds and coulds. I nod my head with understanding. She then speaks patiently of the shouldn’ts, wouldn’ts and couldn’ts. I meet her longing gaze. As she tires my heart breaks when she cries searching for any answer to all her questions of ‘why’.
Poor dear, sweet Suffering……..how you suffer. It is only suffering. It is simply what you are. Suffering suffer-ing.

But she does not see it. At least not yet.
I gather her up and put her into bed. Though the night is perfectly still, and silence seems reasonable, the door announces its closing with a long squeak of its hinges. My gaze glances to see whether my guest has stirred. Indeed, she has. She lifts her arm to draw her guests closer to her. Fear, sadness, anxiety, anger and even happiness, race to her side feeling familiarity and an odd sense of safety. I smile.

It is late and I settle into the couch that was previously occupied just moments ago. I sink into the sag that has not yet recovered, close my eyes and pray to God.

“Thank you, God, for sending Suffering again. You’ll be interested to know she came in the front door this time. She’s been wandering a while and is resting now. Bless her. And God if you would please keep letting her know she is not only welcome here but loved. I’d appreciate it. I love you, too. Good night.”

I awake to birds playing in nature. This time however it’s not the rare songs birds that can lull me back to sleep. It’s the crows and magpies insisting on their territories.
It seems even nature will find something to disagree on.

I creep upstairs to check on my guests. The hinges stay quiet this time. Obvious attempts to tidy the bed have been made as the duvet is fluffed but upside down and the pillows lie uncoordinated beside one another.

Suffering has left. Her friends have left with her. They went silently out the back door this time.

I let the sun coming through the window warm my face as hearing hears the birds arguing. The dishes in the sink still wait for that scrubbing.

I am.

I am.

From Art Ticknor:

I find it unpleasant in varying degrees when I see others suffering. My use of the word is that it’s a second level of distress in reaction to pain, and I  think it depends on the belief that what we are is affected by what we experience. I no longer share that conviction.

Pain is a physical sensation or signal indicating an event within the body. Suffering is the interpretation of that event and involves thoughts, beliefs, or judgments…. ~ NIH

So pain does not necessarily entail suffering, and suffering (a threat against the “intactness of a person”) can be caused by other experiences. ~ NIH

… emotional pain is a signal that something is damaged in our emotional well-being. How one feels about this after it occurs is where suffering comes in. ~ https://livingsystems.ca/emotional-pain-and-suffering/

Suffering results from mental and emotional responses to pain. ~ Psychology Today

=> My acceptance experience (late 1990s) lifted a huge weight off my shoulders, reducing suffering.
=> Self-Realization (2004) lifted the weight of the world off my shoulders, eliminating suffering.

From  Bill R:

I think suffering IS an emotional experience. I think, when one comes into the world, the imperative to be is also an imperative to experience well-being, to experience vitality and exuberance, to indulge in the celebration of being. But as we all know, the world is rife with entities, events and energies that attack our well-being, whether as parasites, predators, competitors, or as the challenges of accident, injury, disaster and tragedy. And every form of attack is perceived as such because it diminishes, drains and debilitates our vital forces, our bio-chemical integrity, our sense of being well and strong. Pain is one of our companions throughout life, and suffering is a response to pain. Suffering is the psychological experience of confusion and disorientation, of anxiety, of despair, of grief, of dying.

What, then, is my attitude toward suffering? When I am suffering, I just want it to stop. But if, as the sages say, life is suffering, does that mean I want to die? It seems more correct to say, I yearn for a permanent state of well-being. But since that which is permanent cannot be found in the impermanent, and since all manifestations of the physical world are impermanent, the deliverance from suffering is not to be found in the material realm. And it is this very reasoning that the sages give as the inducement and motivation to seek Enlightenment. Find that which is beyond form, which is Absolute, and then, “There is a world of potential there also for the individual to explore once he has reached the limits of the Absolute and returned back down the projected Ray of Life.”

From Fernando P:

Once the stimulus has passed, I look for the underlying causes of my suffering. Generally, it has to do with unmanageable/unbearable fear.
Later on, during my meditation practice, the remembrance of that specific suffering arises again.
I let it manifest as it sees fit and use that suffering as a guiding light into my psyche.
If no visible cause for said suffering arises, I let it live in the background and (in my waking life) am on the lookout for other reasons that point to that specific kind of suffering. I do not live in waiting for such specific suffering to appear, as this would point me to misguided causes. Yet, when that suffering arises—apparently out of the blue—I know it has arisen out of the same causes. It’s as if the painted veil Shelley spoke [Lift Not the Painted Veil] of has been lifted a bit.

From Jonathan P:

Usually my first awareness of suffering is in memory, noticing that I’ve been motoring on automatic, in reaction to something painful that’s arisen. This could be from grabbing the glowing screen to suppress a painful thought to speech reacting to irritation. Then after I’m aware of this, more often there’s a negative judgment arising, a sense of failure, or I’ve done wrong. So, a reactive attitude to a reaction, “owned” by “me.” I use the scare quotes because sometimes it’s noticed that this is colored with “I’m doing.”

A few times there’s a bit of energy accumulated. Then the noticing is earlier, even may come up during the tail-end of the reaction to pain. There seems to be a bit more clarity, like the reaction is seen more clearly or is more sharp edged, I’m more separate from it, and there’s a little more “allowing” it. Like seeing its automatic nature, not as much owning it and chastising myself. Sometimes when there’s more energy available I intentionally bring up an irritating event and just look at the reaction. This doesn’t happen very often. So, here I see the owned reaction to a painful stimulus is the actual suffering. Recently I’ve been restlessly pushing away a persistent physical pain. It came up that this avoiding seems energized by fear that any pain is pointing to death, loss of control.

Sometimes when still spaciousness with the witness arises I sense a heaviness, like a cap, a brake, a limit. The noticing is more now, in the present. Exploring this seems useful. The following from a teacher seems to point to something useful for me: “…The illusion of duality is inherently painful. There is just something disconcerting about the way the mind must hold itself and the information it must work to ignore in order to maintain the sense that there is a permanent and continuous self. Maintaining it is painful and its consequences for reactive mind states are also painful. It is a subtle, chronic pain, like a vague nausea.” —Daniel Ingram

From Ben R:

When I’m aware of suffering in the world at large, I feel really sad as well as helpless. It can feel overwhelmingly big. The fact of the suffering that exists in the world can make me feel distrustful in an existential sense, as in “Why is the world this way?” or “What is God doing?” This can make it hard to feel a sense of being at peace in the world.

When suffering arises in my own life, there’s a kind of expectedness to it. It’s always jarring initially, maybe scary or frustrating. But over the years there seems to be a quicker adjustment to putting it into perspective, that there’s no reason to expect my life to be absent of suffering given how much suffering is in the world. And whatever suffering I’m facing is much less than so many others out there. My attitude then turns to moving forward, whether through problem-solving, grieving, or coping as best I can. Still, there can also be moments of just wanting to escape it and distract from suffering, avoid feeling or facing it, and ironically this tends to just create more suffering than was initially there. Sometimes facing suffering happens after distracting and avoiding reaches a breaking point of being worse than the original suffering.

From Anonymous:

My attitude towards suffering rarely is welcoming, openness, curiosity. Most of the time, I think, the response is avoidance. Sometimes the thought associated with the suffering-condition is “I can’t,” and so there is seemingly no possibility of trying anything (further inquiry, etc.). Another unhelpful response to a suffering-condition is “if I had been really/authentically doing inner work, this wouldn’t be happening.”

At this moment—thanks to this month’s writing prompt—I am feeling inspired to work with the resistance-state or suffering-state with curiosity. For instance, if there is resistance to doing something: is there a point of view or voice which seems “more me” than the other part? Simply asking some questions, without trying to change anything. The other important part for me is remembering to try the gentle questioning, the next time a suffering-state arises. A note on my desk, and in the weekly accountability goal-sheet, should help.

Other Reader Feedback

From Don A.

For March’s film clip “Donald Hoffman’s Theory of Consciousness” I would like to pose a few questions. First, to summarize his message: the world we interact with is not an objective reality. Because it is too complex to comprehend and deal with, evolution gave us perception to guide our behavior. The eyeball may be a complex camera to see accurately, but billions of neurons thereafter create a separate world representation made entirely of symbols, making survival possible and easier—as a result, we have no realistic knowledge of a world “out there.”

Hoffman concludes that consciousness is fundamental, and that consciousness is all there is—there is no space-time. But why all the complex camera-like eyeball and perception-cortex if there is no reality “out there” to be perceived?

A question arises as to what might be his interpretation of birth and death, that rather than they too be just perceptions, that they would need to be “more real” than just more symbols as possible origin and termination of consciousness—but if end points are more real, could there be possibly anything else “more real” that could likewise be experienced occurring between the two?

A lot of people believe and may have experienced that animals and even plants have consciousness, too. He mentioned the “tree falling in the forest” dilemma, so a human’s tree symbol undergoes a human tree-falling symbol. But what if a beaver cut down a beaver-symbol tree, to build a beaver symbol-dam. Hoffman mentions an “interactive network of conscious agents that actually cause each other’s experiences.” So beaver’s symbols correlate quite well to human symbols, but if the tree falling is death to a conscious tree, does the tree have a beaver-symbol that caused something more real such as tree-death? And can Hoffman’s “interactive network of conscious agents” cause birth and death to any of it’s participants? Is there a conscious agent that can do anything? What is the experience of human death, beaver death or tree death—is there a type of experience other than perception via symbols of such events?

Next Month

The Reader Commentary question for the May TAT Forum, thanks to Tina N:

Do you have clarity on what you really want out of life?
If yes, what contributed to gaining clarity? If not, what are you doing to gain clarity?

Please your response by the 25th of April, and indicate your preferred identification (the default is your first name and the initial letter of your last name). “Anonymous” and pen names are fine, too.

PS: What question(s) would you like to ask other TAT Forum readers?

Q: What are your thoughts on this month’s reader commentary? Please your feedback.

Richard Rose described a spiritual path as living one’s life aimed at finding the meaning of that life. Did you find anything relevant to your life or search in this month’s TAT Forum?

“Drawing shows several tents and covered wagons encamped on the banks of the Humboldt River in western Nevada. Both women and men prepare food over open fires, haul water, and prepare bedding. In the foreground, inside a covered wagon, a couple courts. Jenks and his party reached here on Friday, July 22, 1859.” ~ Drawing on paper: graphite, ink, crayon and watercolor, by Daniel A. Jenks, thanks to Wikimedia Commons.

We like hearing from you! Please email your comments, suggestions, inquiries, and submissions.

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Founder’s Wisdom

Richard Rose (1917-2005) established the TAT Foundation
in 1973 to encourage people to work together on what
he considered to be the “grand project” of spiritual work.

The Call

A sail is on the sea,
          And ev’ning’s shadows drape
Its mast with mystery,
          The gloaming’s sad lights shape
A quiet-mad eternity.

And for this sail a’sea,
          That storms my spirit through,
On seas of memory,
          In lambent vesper hue,–
For this there burns a fire in me.

A sail is on the sea,–
          My spirit in its hold,
Each eve I gather me
          Its phantom crew of old
And ride the wide, immobile sea.

The sail is on the sea,
          Though waves unfailing stand,–
Are hushed from rolling free,
          Nor break upon the sand,
But stand and whisper soft to me.

A sail is on the sea,
          And shadows from it call,
“Come lad and sail with me.”
          Though painted on the wall,
It cries, “Come lad and sail with me. . . .”

Photo by Inge Wallumrød on pexels.com. See the third verse of Rainbow Connection above for a parallel message. “The Call” is from Carillon: Poems, Essays and Philosophy of Richard Rose.

Definition of Terms

Index of many of the key terms and principles in Rose’s work, with brief definitions, from Richard Rose’s Psychology of the Observer: The Path to Reality Through the Self by John Kent.

Jacob’s Ladder © 2001 Richard Rose. See this transcript of a talk on the topic by Rose.

Homing Ground Update

… A spot on earth where people can do retreats and hold
meetings; where the emphasis is on friendship and the search.

January 2024:

As we start the new year, December donations brought us to just over 20% of our 2023 fundraising goal of $15,750. The bulk of that total came from monthly, recurring donations. A big thank you goes to those core supporters who are there for TAT month in and month out, as well as all of you who choose monthly supporting memberships in TAT. These steady commitments are greatly appreciated and very helpful for TAT’s long-term planning.

An additional $152 came from Amazon purchases in 2024. This is a simple, no-cost way to support TAT but does require remembering to visit the TAT website first and use the Amazon link on this page before you put items in your cart: https://tatfoundation.org/support-tat/. Almost any product is eligible. For example, someone purchased toothpaste on Amazon, and TAT received $0.25 on that purchase.

In 2024, expect to see less frequent, but more effective, reminders of fundraising goals. I think these monthly reminders are a bit like that inspiring quote you put on the refrigerator—it works for a few days and then you don’t notice it anymore.

Thanks to all of you for making TAT the extraordinary organization it is, and best wishes for the new year.

Sincerely,
Shawn Nevins

PS: Monthly contributions are a great way to support the TAT Center if making a larger one-time donation seems too much. If you’re so inspired, click the Donate button below, then check the box for “Make this a monthly donation” as in the example below:

Let’s bring this to life! “The job is upon us,” Richard Rose said, “and it is worthwhile.” To contribute to the TAT Center, mail a check made out to the TAT Foundation to:

TAT Foundation
PO Box 3402
Roxboro, NC 27573

Big checks, little checks, all are welcome. Or use the PayPal link above (though we lose 2.2% of your donation to PayPal fees).

* See photos and more on the Homing Ground page. *

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